Finding happiness in the moment

Well let me start off by saying that it is really hard to find happiness in the moment when that moment is four in the morning and your child is sick. Taking the sheets off the bed, giving that child a bath, giving comfort when you are so tired you can barely keep your eyes open. It is often times hard to find joy when those things are happening. I was able to find joy in it though.

As I was pulling the sheets off the bed and I was giving my child a bath to clean her up, I realized that this is exactly what Heavenly Father does for us. I am not any where near perfect and I make mistakes and there have been times when I am sick. I suffer from depression, which I recently found about a year and a half ago. I am a mother and a friend, a wife and a daughter. I make mistakes. We all do.

Heavenly Father picks us up at any time. It doesn't matter what time, it matters that he is there when we need comfort. I felt that love as I gave comfort to my own child. It was a great feeling.

Recently I was listening to LDSRadio and Cherie Call interviewed Michael McLean. He is an amazing person. I have to say that he has endured through many trials. I have been following his mission to be happy blog and I am continually amazed at his joy in life. I know there are days that are hard to write something "Happy" But somehow he finds a way. His music has literally meant so much to me. I am happy that I have followed his lead in joining the Mission to Be happy. I have thoroughly enjoyed being a part of it.

Thank you Michael for your love. It truly shows through your music and your heart.

Thank you Heavenly Father for picking me up and comforting me when I need you. Even at four in the morning!

Cynthia

The joys of Dancing

Today started out rough. This morning I got a call from my husband and the way he was talking it sounds like he will be taking some time off because there is no work. I was already having a hard day when I got to the gym. I just about lost it. I couldn't handle the stress and I finally broke down. My trainer helped me focus all my frustrations on the weight equipment which really helped. He was very kind and understanding. I was so glad he was there. After that I did a few things and then came home. I laid on the couch and took a nap and then stayed on the couch all evening. Until it was time to get the kids ready for bed. They did their chores and then they all got ready. Then we had scriptures and Prayer and story time.

Thinking I was done, my youngest (2) comes up to me and says "dance mommy!" I said, not right now because I was tired and frustrated with the day. Well then all 3 kids thought it would be fun so they turned on the music. Yep you guessed it, the M2B:) soundtrack came on. The kids and I danced for half an hour and had so much fun. It is amazing the joy that dancing can bring you. It was so much fun. They were so happy for that half an hour and it was good to see them smiling.

I think maybe Dancing will be a new bedtime routine. It was so much fun!

Have a Happy day!

Cynthia

Validation

Thank you Jennifer for this video. I think this is an amazing video. Enjoy!

Oh Boy, I've got Joy!

Okay so I can't get that song out of my head, possibly because that is how I am feeling today. I have had a very productive and good day. I did all the things I needed to and had fun doing them. Even the not so pleasant things :) Anyway I have had this song in my head all day and I can't get it out! So instead of getting it out of my head I will post it here. Have a happy day!

Oh boy, I've got Joy, I do, Do you?

It starts in my heart and spreads to my head in a minute or two,

and did you know it can grow on my toes, and make my knees so they don't freeze

I feel so neat from my head to my feet

Cause I've got joy

Oh boy, I've got joy, I do, Do you?

It starts in my heart and spreads to my head in a minute or two,

And the best place to show is below my nose

for a mile or two I've got a smile for you

I feel so neat from my head to my feet

Cause I've got Joy,

I've got joy

OH BOY!

Recognition

I am not one to go out and say LOOK what I did! I actually am very against being recognized for anything. I don't like being the center of attention. Well today is no different. I still don't like being the center of attention. BUT.....I have just received a letter from the Superintendents office. It says, and I quote,

I would like to congratulate you for being named ______Elementary Volunteer of the Year!

Yeah.......Anyway I am apparently the Volunteer of the year! Woot!

So despite not wanting to be the center of attention, I get to go be the center of attention at a meeting next week. They wish to recognize me and I will go, but I don't have to like it. ;o) But I probably will.....Have a happy week!!!

Napping and other random Sunday things

OK so I have to tell you all that Valentines is NOT a big holiday in my house. As a matter of fact, this year was the first year I decorated in the 9 years I have been married to my loving husband. Usually I make my husband a card or a goodie and give it to him and tell him how much I love him. He usually forgets until the last moment and runs to the store to get something. Anyway Valentines hasn't been such a big deal. I have gotten use to the fact that it probably never will be either.

Anyway that is not the point of my post.

Today I went to church. Sat through our Ward conference and related to many of the stories and lessons taught. I cried in Sunday school as a member of the stake presidency got up and talked about how in order for us to experience true happiness, we have to go through sometimes awful and heartbreaking trials. Otherwise we can not experience it. Of course that is one of the many realizations I came to today.

I came home and having fallen asleep at 4 in the morning and waking up at 7:30 I was feeling a bit tired. I stayed awake as long as I could. I finally took a nap out of protest about 4:30 this afternoon. I slept way too long......as I was trying to wake up my daughter got up on the couch and took my face between her hands and said "Mommy, Wake up" She gave me a kiss and then told me to NAP again......LOL! It was so cute. It made my day. My kids are continually showing their love to me even on the days that are not set apart for LOVEY DOVEY holidays. :) That makes me really happy. I experienced the pain and frustration and trials to bring these wonderful children into the world and I am so happy because of it. Maybe it is the perfect example, maybe it is just the beginning, maybe I have many more trials to endure, maybe I have experienced the worst. Who knows. All I know is that now I am ready to take on whatever may come, I may not enjoy it but at least I know that there is a reason behind experiencing the trials and I can make it through them knowing the blessing that awaits at the end.

Have a fabulous Sunday Evening and GO USA!!!

Sweet precious children

I haven't written in a few days. I have been super busy with life.

My children are my joy. I love them with all my heart and I often wonder if I am making life good for them. Well Yesterday I got my answer.

I am the PTA president at the kids elementary school. I have quite a few things going on right at this moment in time. One of them was Parent Teacher conference dinner (we provide dinner for the teachers) and Book fair (which happens during the conference). Well I had a friend come volunteer to help at the book fair so I could go to my kids Conferences. She also watched my other kids while I was with each kid at their conferences. The first conference was with my son, so I left my girls with my friend and went to his conference. When I got back, my friend told me what my girls did.

My youngest was really tired (way past naptime) and so my oldest daughter laid down all the coats on the floor of the room they were in, then she went and got a book off of one of the shelves at the bookfair and read it to her. After she was asleep she put the book away. My friend told her that she was being so sweet. My oldest returned with this "Well I just want her to grow up and be happy in life, just like I am."

Hearing that makes me feel good. I was so happy that they are being taken care of and that they feel loved and happy in life. It makes me feel like a good mom. I will forever remember this.

(p.s. Our bird died today, my oldest had a really hard time with it, but she is going to be okay, I think our next adventure will be fish.......)

Maybe today is just a day of sorrow

I have had a rough day today. I read about a friend who lost his Nephew in Law of 27. No one knows why and they have very few answers. I can imagine how hard it must be to hear news of that nature. I have been there. I have a good friend who lost her husband a few years ago and I remember hearing the news on the phone and thinking, this is too much. What happened? Why? What is my friend going to do? How can I help her? I live in Utah, she lives in OHIO! I felt helpless. I felt useless. Today is no different. I can't help my friend, he barely knows me. I wish there was something I could say to make it all better but having been through many losses in the last year I know that NOTHING I say can make the pain go away.

Today was also hard for me emotionally. In October I found out I lost my baby, well today I found out that the day I found out about losing my baby, another friend was in the hospital having a D&C. Had I known she was dealing with that I would have been able to go to her and give her a hug but I was wallowing in my own pain and feeling pity for myself. The sorrow of finding out you have lost something that means so much to you is so hard. As my friend was talking about this during the Testimony part of Relief society, I could no longer hold in my tears. I had held in my tears for so long that they just flowed.

So I have nothing happy to say today. Just know that I am still on my mission, it is just taking a small detour today. I am keeping my friend in my prayers and those who have had to deal with a loss at any time in their lives. You know who you are. I love you all greatly.

Good Exhaustion

I am absolutely exhausted right now. I should go to bed, however I am here writing on the blog. Today was my daughters Baptism. Such a wonderful experience. She was so beautiful in her white dress. I got some good pictures and we got to spend time with many wonderful friends and family.

Last night we went swimming at the hotel with some of the family. The kids had a lot of fun. They love to go swimming and anytime family stays in a local hotel that is what we do.

Tonight I am happy that everyone is gone. I am happy that my kids are sleeping and I am ready to go to bed myself because I am exhausted! What a wonderful feeling. To be exhausted. To be filled with the spirit and to know that my daughter is making the right choices in her life. I am so happy for her. I know that she will be a great leader and friend to everyone. I hope that she will remember the feelings she felt today and I hope that she had a neat experience.

Today she received several gifts from various people. One of the gifts she received was 10 dollars. She has been saving up her Christmas, Birthday and other money to go on a trip to Washington with us in a few months. She asked me today if she could get a set of scriptures and I told her if that is what she wanted to do then she could spend her money on that and I would find jobs for her to do to earn more money for Washington. So we went to the distribution center and she bought her a very nice quad and she had her name put on it with her money. She was so excited. She can't wait to use them tomorrow.

So today I am experiencing the GOOD exhaustion. Hopefully I can get enough sleep to make it through tomorrow.

Sorry I haven't posted in a few days! Have a restful Sunday :)

On a mission to De clutter!

Holy cow! Can you believe this?? This house is a holy living disaster! I can't stand it anymore and I am not happy when I am in this mess!

Okay that is the realization I came to about a week ago. I decided that in order to help me on my mission to be happy that I am going to have to declutter my house. I thought my house was okay, not too horrible, however after just de cluttering 3 rooms yesterday I learned that I have been carrying a heavy load every single day of my life. 3 rooms may have changed the way I do things. I have got to get rid of stuff! My life is affected by it, my heart is affected by it. I am learning that when the house is clean I feel so much better but it is still cluttered! I am working on getting rid of the clutter in my house.

Now as for the clutter in my life, well I have been working on that one for a while. I am trying really hard to become better at letting things go and learning that I can do hard things. I can be the person I want to be. I just have to have faith to take the first steps into the unknown.

So today I am happy to get rid of the clutter and as for Punxatawney Phil, I hope his house isn't too cluttered because he is going to be spending the next 6 weeks inside! Happy Groundhog Day!

The dreaded Shot!

I promised. I did. I told her that it was going to hurt but that it would be worth it when she was feeling better by tomorrow. She didn't want to believe me because she hates Shots!

I am talking about my 8 year old daughter. Today we had to take her to insta-care because she had a pretty high fever (Again) and her throat was hurting her pretty badly. They were busy, busy, busy. We looked at magazines and she played on my phone while waiting. Finally after waiting for over an hour the doctor came in and told us that her culture had come back positive for strep throat (totally what I expected to hear). She then gave us the options...... 1. Take a liquid medication for 2 weeks OR 2. get the shot, one time and don't worry about it ever again.

Here are the things I know. 1. The medication works! IT does, however it takes a few days to kick in well enough for you to start feeling better. 2. The shot works. I know it does, same concept. However you start feeling better THAT DAY or THE NEXT DAY!

As I explained it to my daughter, and I told her that if she wanted to feel better quickly that she should choose the shot over the medication, she looked at me and finally said. Okay mom, I believe you.

As she got the shot, she wasn't very happy with me and she screamed! However after a few minutes and some crazy off the subject conversation and a yummy popsicle from the nurse, she was fine. She came to me this evening and said her throat still hurts a little but it feels a lot better.

It felt good to know that I was there to assure her that even though it would hurt, that it would help her feel better faster. She still loves me, even though she hates shots :)

Spending time with mom

I don't get a whole lot of time with my mom as we live in different cities. Today my mom took me to the Salon and I got my hair cut. I love to go there with my mom and we have turned it into a tradition. Every few months we go and get our hair done, or pedicures, or manicures, etc. It is so much fun!

I got my hair cut today. It feels so good to get all the damaged ends cut off. My head feels lighter. I just love the feel of healthy hair.

Even though my poor daughter isn't feeling well (which was the cause of all her beastly behavior last night) I was still able to go with my mom to the salon and enjoy some time with her. That really makes me happy :)

Cynthia

Child of God

Today has been a very hard day for my dear daughter who has epilepsy. She is on a medication that makes her restless. She takes the medication and she tosses and turns all night long. She is super Hyper in the mornings, does good during school, then is super mean, angry, and Tired in the evenings. Today was one of the worst days since she was diagnosed. As the day progressed she got mean and angry but more than usual. I started to get upset but then I remembered. It isn't her fault and no matter what she is a Child of God.

Remembering that helped me to calm down and work with her and help her get it together. She is now in bed and sleeping but it won't be long before she is tossing and turning. Hopefully we can find a good amount of medication that helps to keep the seizures in control and not make her so angry and tired. Here's Hoping!

I Am A Child Of God

I am a child of God and he has sent me here, has given me an earthly home with parents kind and dear, lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find the way, teach me all that I must do to live with him someday.

I am a child of God and so my needs are great, help me to understand his words before it grows to late, lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find the way, teach me all that I must do to live with him someday.

I am a child of God, Rich blessings are in store, if I but learn to do his will, I'll live with him once more. Lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find the way, teach me all that I must do to live with him someday.

I can't get this song out of my head!

It is a great thing and it makes me smile, and I can't get it out of my head!

The song is from Michael McLean's M2B:) soundtrack. It is called Paul and John. I love it and OOOOOOOO I am having a good time with it today. I have had several OOOOOOOHHH moments today. Tonight is the best one. I got ready to go to the gym and I walked outside and it was really foggy. The first thing that came to my mind was A foggy day (Frank Sinatra) I started singing it and realized that my town would fit in this song really well. I sang it all the way to the gym and then I sang it again as I left the gym! I was having so much fun. Anyway I like to sing OOOOOOHHH with Michael as he sings on his cd. I love it. I am always happy when I am singing that song. My kids look at me funny when I sing along as loud as I can, but it is worth it!

I am looking forward to many more OOOOOOOHHHHH moments in my life!

When I sing OOOooooOoOoooOOHHHHhHHHhhh!

Cynthia

Running!

I used to be a runner. I would run a few miles a day. I loved it. well that is until I got pregnant with my first kid. (Now if my parents are reading this they are probably wondering how they didn't know I used to run, well mom and dad I started running when I was in College and I have loved it since). About 4 months into my pregnancy I started showing signs of Toxemia. They put me on bed rest (as if I listened, and my parents didn't know that either because if they would have known they would have made me stay on bedrest) I tried to slow things down and I quit running. It was hard to go from running a few miles a day to NOTHING! I had to sit on the couch or rest. I tried my best to keep from doing things but I just can't sit still that long. ANYWAY not the point of the story, the point is that I like to run.

Yesterday as I was at the gym I thought to myself, hey I am overweight but I am feeling good. I turned up the treadmill speed and I began running.....IT FELT SOOOOO GOOD! I ran for 5 minutes before I had to slow down. I wasn't running really fast but fast enough to feel that wonderful burst of energy.

I am looking forward to running more often, as a matter of fact I am going to go running on the treadmill tonight....IT FEELS GREAT!!! :)

Have a happy day!